In 1997 I got sent to Prison. I’d never seen or been around drugs, I got padded up with a guy I had known for some time; he was on heroin but I didn’t associate with the people on drugs. I tried to keep myself away from that lifestyle; I went to the gym a lot while I was locked up. I got quite addicted to going all the time; my pad mate was getting bullied so I looked after him. One day I had a visit and it didn’t go very well, I was upset and angry when I went back to my pad, my friend was sat smoking it so I said to him “come on then give me some, let’s see what the fuss is all about”. So every time my friend had some I shared it with him.
That’s how I ended up with an addiction to heroin; I will never forget that man who introduced me to drugs. I wish I never had tried the devil drug, it ruins your life. What I would say to anyone going to try it ‘just stop’ and think about it, it ruins your life and the people around you who love you, it ruins their lives too. This addiction has gone on since I first ever tried that poison, I have struggled with this drug for 20 years on and off, I have lost my job, wife, kids and home. It has caused me to suffer with mental illness, anxiety, depression and a strong feeling of worthlessness. It has now got to the point where I feel I’m getting too old now to be able to fix my life and get back what I have lost. It’s an awful feeling to think that you’re now left on your own because of all the bad things you have done because of the effects of that heroin and cocaine have caused. I’ve lost my family and very good friends. I feel I’m never going to get this back, if only I could go back in time and fix this! But obviously I can’t.
This was how Jack (not his real name) felt when he came to us. He is now stable in services and is beginning to believe in a future.
No matter how hopeless you feel, there is a way out