Some days, I feel I can’t do this

Every time I thought I’d hit rock bottom, I hadn’t, but this last time in my life I had; homeless, bum parked on a park bench. Hopeless situation, what could I do this time?

The latest part of my story started some time ago. I started to go back to the junction and with their support went to Bradley park rest house, did a detox, went back to my flat, I still had a roof then. Within hours I had started drinking again. Me, what a stupid waste of space I am. The detox nurse at the junction was straight there to support me. I said the only way out for me was detox, leave town, rehab, no other option.

How things at this moment have changed for me. The salvation army have taken me on. The first two weeks were really hard, I detoxed myself. The junction put me on medication to help with cravings. I am now in a really good routine. When I am at home the staff are really supportive towards me.

Some days, I feel I can’t do this, stay dry when there are quite a lot of people with drink related problems around me. So far I can, and I do attend the ASPIRE groups. I look forward to seeing the other members. I feel happy when I get my phone call on a Monday morning from the volunteer checking I’m OK. Also if I ever need to talk she is on the other end of the phone.

The one thing I have learned over the years is you cannot do it on your own. I’ve tried that many times, it does not work.

Today I’m happy, I’m not alone and everything is going just fine.

 

Lynda

Published 31st January 2013

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